Friday, January 27, 2006
Warning! Contents May Explode Under Pressure

You know the type--someone calls you on the phone and they're intent on telling you whatever information is vital at that point in time and you can't get a word in edgewise.  That's not necessarily bad, because you want to hear the information.  Well a while ago one such person called me on the phone. After the first minute, I realized that I had to pee, and I had to pee right then.  This wasn't the type of person I could say "Hey, I have to pee" to which they respond, "go ahead I don't mind."  This person was most definitely not one of those types, and while I don't have a peeing-while-on-the-phone phobia I do know that I am choosy with whom I share that part of me.
I needed to be pee free something fierce, and I got a brilliant notion that I could slowly and quietly pee while this person was droning on. My need to pee was beyond the potty dance; this was a medical emergency. So there I was trying to drip-pee when I realized that this was NOT GOING TO WORK. I tried to pee a little at a time. It's not normal to pee that way, trust me. To quote one of my students "I think I hurted myself." I didn't finish the job until after I hung up. Oh and to women everywhere, that thing about kegals - lies.